"Dear Senator Obama ..."

No, I'm not going to write the Senator a letter. I don't want him to have my e-mail address. But if I were going to write him one, this is what it would say:

"Thank you for finally saying something substantive, something more than just platitudinous references to 'Hope' and 'Change.' In doing so, you have caused me to re-think my decision regarding my vote in Tuesday's presidential election.

You see, before your statement, it had been my intent to write in Ron Paul's name. You, Sen. McCain, and Sen. Biden all voted for the ill-conceived bailout plan, demonstrating to me your total ignorance regarding all things economic. But with a few simple words, you swayed me.

You called me selfish, because I believe that I pay enough in taxes as it is.

I don't know about hope, but talk about audacity.

Let's examine just how selfish I am. Yes, I make a very comfortable living - above your threshold of 'rich,' depending on the day, since your definition seemingly changes by the day. But I'm comfortably above the lowest threshold you threw out, at least. What do I do to redistribute my wealth, besides paying taxes?

Well, for starters, I give a considerable amount to charity - more than you, in fact, even though you're a multi-millionaire and I'm not. The money I voluntarily give helps repair and improve schools in the local community - schools the government refuses to take care of with its tax dollars. It helps feed and clothe the homeless in Kansas City as well. It helps hurricane victims in the Gulf region, tornado victims in Greensburg, KS, and flood victims in Iowa and Missouri. It helps bring medical care to the poor in Mexico, helps house and educate displaced flood victims in Honduras, helps build churches in Russia and the Ukraine, and helps fight the spread of AIDS and malaria in sub-Saharan Africa.

I also take care of my own. When my Mom's furnace shot craps a couple of years ago, during the winter, and she called me in tears, not having the money to replace it, I bought her a furnace. When my elderly aunt and her daughter didn't have enough money to fly from Texas to North Carolina earlier this year to attend the funeral of my cousin, who had died quite suddenly, I used my frequent flyer miles to buy their tickets.

Why am I reluctant to pay more in taxes, given that I'm such a charitable soul?

Simple: I'm a better steward of money than you and your ilk. I think I can do a little better job of redistributing wealth than giving it to makers of wooden arrows for toy bow-and-arrow sets. You obviously can't.

Neither can McCain, and neither can Biden. Hence my conclusion that I should vote my conscience and write in Ron Paul, who can, even though I knew that would be a throw-away vote that would benefit you. Much as my vote for Ross Perot in 1992 was a de facto vote for Bill Clinton.

But, as I said, you've swayed me.

Let's talk about you now. You have a grandmother in Kenya, who, according to you, lives on a buck-fifty a day. You're a multi-millionaire. Ever send her a check? Nope. But you saw fit to use her story in your best-selling book, the one that netted you millions. When you spent taxpayer money for a trip to Kenya to further your campaign for president, you stopped in on granny for a photo op. Then you told her you didn't have any more time to spend with her, because, hey, you're a busy guy.

Don't worry, Barack. Granny loves you anyway.

You also have a half-brother in Kenya who lives in poverty, and whom you also don't help.

Then there's Auntie Zeituni, your "favorite aunt," according to your memoir. (Even more audacity: a 47-year-old guy who has yet to accomplish anything of substance in his life writes a memoir? When the original assignment was to write a book on race relations? Apparently you think your life story is more important than the global issue of race relations.)

Auntie Z. lives in a slum in Boston. You used her in your book. But have you given her a dime? No. Now, we learn that she's here illegally. When asked about it, you basically suggest she should be deported: "all appropriate laws should be followed."

Oh, but she broke yet another law: she contributed $260 to your campaign. Yes, even though you never gave her so much as a dime of the riches you reaped from the book you used her in, she - who lives in public housing - gave you $260. Since she's not a citizen, that's an illegal contribution. Bet you're not advocating that all appropriate laws be followed on that one, huh?

You also said of Auntie Z., "I never really knew her." So what did she do to gain "favorite aunt" status - promise you that if you ever ran for president she'd give you money?

Then there's Uncle Omar, who also lives in poverty in Boston - or he did, until thieves broke into his place and beat and robbed him, then he was evicted.

And about your charitable giving: it's a woefully pitiful fraction of your income. And you never gave a dime until you declared your candidacy.

So, I'm selfish? Dude, given your net worth, your income, your treatment of your family, and your giving, you're the poster child for selfishness.

Oh, don't get me wrong. I know many people like you - people who brag incessantly about how much money they make or how well their investments are doing, but don't do a thing to help their families, don't show any interest in how their kids or grandkids or aged parents are doing, don't give a dime to charity, and don't lift a finger to help those less fortunate than them. And to a person, these aren't the stereotypical GOP fat-cats, at least not the ones I know. They're the self-described 'centrists' who've never voted for somebody without a 'D' behind their name in their lives, who get their jollies ridiculing people of faith, and want government to regulate everything. Obama supporters, all.

And, like you, empty buckets.

Well, I have no use for the lot of you. And for you to have the audacity to call me selfish, because I don't want to put yet more money into the hands of a socialistic wealth-redistributing pork-barrel spendthrift like you, is just the last straw.

Sorry, Barack. But I can't throw away a vote on principle for Ron Paul, even though I - unlike you - am a principled guy.

I'm voting on the best chance to ensure that Barack Obama is never POTUS.

Thanks to you, I'm voting for John McCain."