Interlude

Okay, tomorrow I'll get to my Paulson, Geithner and bail-out bashing. For now, I've got to take on the lighter side of the news.

First, we learn that Ashlee Simpson - Homer's daughter? - name her kid "Bronx Mowgli." What??? Do these people think they can insulate these kids from the real world forever? Or are they just setting them up for a reality TV spot 20 years from now? Or are they really savvy, and banking on the likelihood that, by the time their kids are grown, the world as we know it will have ceased to exist, due to the coming global financial meltdown?

My guess is that they're just clueless. Keanu Reeves said it best in "Parenthood" (and I'm paraphrasing): "You need a license to buy a gun, or drive a car. But any idiot can be a parent."

Next, Madonna has divorced her ex, Guy Ritchie. Why? Ritchie's "unreasonable behavior." Let's see, Madonna's done a porn book, converted to the whole Kabbalah thing, and, of course, released many songs that are just plain painful to listen to. But Ritchie's "unreasonable?" The only unreasonable thing I can find about the guy is that, after years of putting up with her general freakiness, he said he didn't want any of her money. Dude, this is the bail-out era - get what you can, while you can. Lord knows you paid your dues.

Okay, my PSU Gorillas got jobbed Saturday, losing by three points to the detestable Bearcats of Northwest Mizzourah State U. by a total of three points, after coughing up three turnovers and suffering a pathetically bad late-hit-out-of-bounds call that gave the 'Cats a field goal that would provide the deciding margin of victory.

No matter. The 'Cats travel to Abilene, Texas to take on the Wildcats of Abilene Christian U. - which whupped the 'Cats in their own house in the season opener. More significantly, the offensive juggernaut that is ACU won their Saturday playoff game against cross-state rival West Texas A&M by the score of 93-68 - that's football, folks, not basketball. ACU scored their 93 points in just 23 minutes of possession. The NW D was totally befuddled by Pitt in the second half Saturday. With ACU's no-huddle offense, plus their trifecta of the best QB, RB and WR in Division II football, NW is toast on D. They'd better come up with a way to score 95 points on ACU - which may not be all that hard, come to think of it.